Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Operation: Prettify Me!

  • Hit the gym at least 3-4 times a week, with my buddy Marq
  • Don new haircut from David's salon
  • Facial plus whitening mask from Let's Face It (with 2 bonus check up)
  • Feetish Foot Spa from the Spa
  • Body scrub
  • Body massage
  • Eyebrow threading & upper lip waxing from Lay Bare
  • Prophylaxis
  • Vitamins C & E
  • Cereals & milk
  • Lots of H2O
  • Spa salt scrub & papaya soap
  • Manicure & Pedicure
.. got anything else to add? feel free to leave your comments. 'will surely appreciate it! :)

Behind the Myth: 7 Misconceptions about Single Women...

Myth #1: Single women are desperate.
Truth: When you become single, the world opens up for you again. That doesn't mean you have to date the world. But some may think that it's exactly what you want. The truth of the matter is that single women do have standards, and will not settle for whatever comes their way. So don't dump your toothless second cousin or pyromaniac college roommate on us. Available doesn't mean hopeless.

Myth #2: Single women are out to get your man.
Truth: Stop looking at us like we just had him last night! While he may be a decent guy, that doesn't mean that we're going to hit on him every chance we get. At a club, at a bar, at the beach, we're there to have some fun, not hit on every man we see. And you with the wandering eye…if you've got a girlfriend, stop acting like a pimp daddy before I poke your eye out.

Myth #3: Single women yearn to get married.
Truth: Since we're single, the next natural progression would be for us to get married. Except not. It would make more sense for a woman in a relationship to think about marriage (if they believed in that), not the single one. For starters, it would be nice to find a good man to have a meaningful relationship with, and we wouldn't settle for less (see Myth #1). Either way, not all single women want to get married. That's a big step, yo.

Myth #4: Single women are single because there's something wrong with them.
Truth: Everyone at one point in his or her life will be single. So is that to say that there is something wrong with everyone in the world? I think not. So stop looking at us like we have leprosy. One day you might find yourself single, and you wouldn't want us to point and laugh at you, right?

Myth #5: Single women envy other people's relationships.
Truth: Some couples were meant to be together from the start. When they're together, birds sing, the sun shines a little brighter, and everyone feels the love because there's so much of it coming out of their pores. Good for them. Sure, we all want that, but it's not like single women sit in their rooms at night and cut out their picture, find a photo of a happy couple, and stick their picture over the woman's face. That's just psycho. A good relationship is great, but we want to have our own magic, not other people's magic.

Myth #6: Single women live with many cats, probably as substitutes for a man.
Truth: I am allergic to cats. There you go.

Myth #7: Single women make finding a man their number one priority.
Truth: Single women have lives too. Sure, we don't have those special nights out with our boyfriends, trips with our boyfriends, or even hours of sex with our boyfriends, but we still manage to find things to do. Single women work, go to school, volunteer, party, appear in music videos, manage children's sports teams, paint, take guitar lessons, karaoke, rescue injured animals in the park, and the list goes on. Sometimes we are just too busy to remember to stick our chests out and suck our tummies in when we walk by a gentleman. So while meeting someone and connecting would be nice, it is not our number one priority. ¤ C.Ho.

Surviving a break-up...

Chances are that, at least once in your lifetime, you will experience a break-up. The most important thing to keep in mind is that it happens to everyone, and life does go on. As someone who has gone through several break-ups, I can attest that as bleak as things may look, eventually the pain and hurt do dissipate. There was a life before him, and there will be a life after him. One of the best moments of life is waking up and realizing that you can stand on your own again. But, things are easier said than done, and everyone has a different healing process.

Relationships can become an addiction, and once they're over, the withdrawal can be consuming. Typically, people go through these stages:

The Mourning Stage
The break-up can be imminent or spontaneous, but real nonetheless. Give yourself some time to deal with the revelation and to adjust to the change. It's natural to feel sadness, grief and depression - just don't dwell on it. Don't be afraid to get it all out. Cry if you have to, wallow in self-pity, write in your journal. The important thing is to try to accept what happened and to move on.

The Angry Stage
All of a sudden, you can hear every mean thing he's said, all the stupid things he's done, all the lies he's told. You make a list of all the things you wish would fall on his head. Trust me, I've been fixated on this stage many times before. This part of the process is natural, as long as you keep your rage in check. Keying his car may seem like a good idea at the time, but in the long run it won't change things or make them better, and you may end up on Judge Judy as the "psycho ex-girlfriend."

The Preoccupied Stage
People experiencing this step immerse themselves in every activity under the sun, from scuba diving to building bird feeders. It's very constructive to keep yourself busy, but don't use this as a way to ignore your feelings.

The Lonely Stage
Couples surround you everywhere you go. Even your cat is getting some action. You feel abandoned, alone, and depressed. Take this time to really think about your situation. Are you missing the person, the comfort, or the relationship? You don't have to be alone. Re-connect with old friends, or concentrate on cementing close relationships. Don't be afraid to seek comfort in your friends and family, that's what they're there for.

The Blame Stage
Don't blame yourself, and don't blame your partner. What's done is done, and if things didn't work out, chances are he's not the one anyway. Learn to take things constructively instead of keeping score. You may feel like you've been wronged, but never play the victim. You know you're stronger than that.

The Learning Stage
Never have regrets in life, learn from your mistakes, and use these lessons to improve on your future relationships.

The Single Stage
Now that you've healed and moved on, you will find that being single has its advantages. Focus on yourself and do everything you've wanted to do. The extra time you would've spend dealing with your partner's problems or constant fighting can now be put to good use. Embrace your singledom!

The Do's and Don't of Surviving a Break-Up

  • DO get it all out. Wallow in self-pity, cry into your pillow, write bad poetry. Express your feelings as openly as you can. The more you keep things inside, the worse the feelings can become.
  • DON'T stay bitter. Don't take it out on your friends, or shut people out of your life. It's understandable that you may need some time alone, but don't prolong this period or you may find that you've isolated yourself from the rest of the world. If you don't feel like talking just yet, let your friends know. Don't leave them in the dark, especially if they reach out to you.
  • DO think positively. A positive state of mind will manifest into a positive outlook on life.
  • DON'T lose faith in people. Assuming that all men out there are scum could result in you missing out on someone great.
  • DO something new. Whether it's a class or hobby, try to pick something that you and your partner did not share an interest in. The less reminded you are, the better. By making the activity your own, you're asserting your independence from the relationship.
  • DON'T lead others on. If you're not over someone yet, make that clear. After all, you wouldn't want to be someone else's rebound.
  • DO keep active socially. Call up your old friends, have a girls' night out, start a study group. You'll find that surrounding yourself with other people will make you feel better, and the support they provide is like a big comfort blanket.
  • DON'T listen to sad music. This will only make the wallowing worse. At all costs, avoid putting on the mixed CD that he made for your six-month anniversary.
  • DO pamper yourself. Pick something that will lift your spirits and do it. Is it a manicure? A new outfit? A day at the casino? Whatever tickles your fancy, do it.
  • DON'T contact your ex. If you still care about him and want to know how he's doing, give yourself some time to boost your ego first. Contacting him too soon could result in more pain and a longer time to heal.
  • DO let go of the relationship. You may end up together in the long run, but for now, consider things done and certainly don't wait around for him to come around. Life is too short for you to be waiting around for someone.
  • DON'T gossip. Things may come back to you, and by then it'll be too late to take things back. As tempting as that may be, resist the urge to bad-mouth your ex.
  • DO make a list of his annoying qualities. It may seem like a childish thing to do, but it's very therapeutic and will help you realize that things were better this way.
  • DON'T set time frames for yourself. So your best friend always seems to bounce back from a relationship. So your ex is already dating someone else. So what? Take things day-by-day and at your own pace. Give time its chance to heal things, and in the meantime, look for the best in yourself and remember that you're an ultra-cool vixen who doesn't need a man to feel complete.
  • DO change your environment. Do this especially if you've lived with the person. Take pictures down, gather his things in a box and place it as far away from you as possible, rearrange the furniture. Even if you haven't lived with the person, you may find that a little rearranging can do wonders for the soul.
The Break-Up Kit
Everyone needs a break-up kit. Try these suggestions to mend a broken heart:
  • a garbage can to trash all his belongings
  • a book of matches and a fire extinguisher if you feel like burning all his belongings in the garbage can
  • a Polaroid to take pictures of you burning his belongings in the garbage can
  • bath salts and scented candles for a calming bath (and to get rid of the smoky smell on your clothes)
  • a mixed CD of "I'm over it" songs, i.e. I Will Survive (Gloria Gaynor), I Will Love Again (Laura Fabian), Stronger (Britney Spears), Survivor (Destiny's Child)
  • a journal to jot down your thoughts
  • some inspirational books, i.e. the Chicken Soup for the Soul series
  • some funny movies, i.e. Friday, Charlie's Angels, Austin Powers
  • a punching bag and gloves to get your aggressions out (and get fit at the same time!)
Let's face it: break-ups aren't fun. But with a little time, you'll find that your life will be even better than before. Don't give up on love, and remember that with every tear, you'll have fifty more smiles coming your way. C.Ho.

Monday, September 27, 2010

What I Love You means..

I love you’ means that I accept you for the person that you are and that I do not wish to change you into someone else. It means that I do not expect perfection from youjust as you do not expect it from me. It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. It means loving you when you’re in a bad mood or too tired to do the things I want to do. It meansloving you when you’re downnot just when you’re fun to be with. ‘I love you’ means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them—asking in return only that you do not judge me for mine. It means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love enough not to let go. It meansthinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, and hoping that you feel the same way for me.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Letting Go!

There are people who can walk away from you.And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk.

Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The Bible said that,they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you.And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. Let them go. And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise thedead. You've got to know when it's dead.

You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good- bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it.

Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!

If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and intended for your life, then you need to LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ...LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth...LET IT GO!! !

If someone has angered you .. LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge . LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction ... LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents... LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude...LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better... LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new leve lin Him... LET IT GO!! !

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship....LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to helpthemselves...LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed ...LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling Yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you needto... LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. GOD is doing a new things for YOU!!! LET IT GO!!!

Get Right or Get Left .. think about it, and then LET IT GO!!! "The Battle is the Lord's!"

On Being Single

Too often people want what they want, or think they want at the moment,which is usually "happiness" right now. The irony of their impatience isthat only by learning to wait, and by willingness to accept the bad with thegood do we usually attain those things that are truly worthwhile. I have ablessing which is sometimes seen as a curse. I am blessed with the gift ofbeing single.

For most of us twenty something young professionals, it seems the world has already come up with its own set of expectations on how we should live life.The world expects us to finish school in our early twenties, get a job, findthe love of our lives by the time we reach our mid-twenties, marry and havekids. But the thing is, noteveryone sees their dreams come true in the same way. In this article, Ishall try to endeavor to change the way the world looks at being single.

The Art of Contentment.

For most of us, being single will be more of a phasethan a final destination. This is the best place to practice the art ofcontentment. Someday, I'm sure most of us will fall in love and get married.But the thing is, love will always be tested.Someone more handsome, more charming, richer, funnier, sweeter would comealong. If you have not practiced the art of contentment as a single person,chances are you would be tempted to want that and not cherish your chosenone. Practicing the Art of Contentment as a single person means that youtake what life gives you, good or bad, you're willing to see it through.

It means you don't walk away every time things get tough because it builds in you patience, perseverance, understanding and a hundred different virtues that people in a hurry will never have. Being single means you would find how it feels to be alone thus, allowing you to cherish every moment you spend with your chosen one. The art of contentment means you wouldn't mind if life had to make you wait for solong to find the love of your life, because you know that the waiting would only make the finding much sweeter.

A Time to Know Yourself Better.

Being single is a time of your life when youcan get to know yourself better. You can pursue different interests andpassions without having to ask another person's approval. It is a phase whenyou can keep focus on other things, discover your potentials and talents,and see yourself become more than what you expect to be. Allow yourself tosurprise you. Stop wasting precious energy trying to figure out why you'restill romantically unattached. It's all in the mind. Take the time to go see your friends, spend time with your family, do charity work and you will realizethat you are not, and never for one moment, was alone. Try to get to knowyourself first before you try to get to know other people. To be truly loved means to be known and acceptedfor who you are. How do you expect other people to know you and to love you,when you don't know who and what you really are?

A Choice between Good and Best.

Sometimes the dilemmas we face are notbetween what is absolutely bad and absolutely good. Sometimes, it's betweengood and best. Treat this stage of your life as a phase to evaluate who isgood for you and who is best for you. Sometimes, you won't hear music, orfeel magic to know who's best for you. Theheart just knows and it doesn't need any romantically charged scenario todecide on the matter. Trust in your heart, and trust that time willeventually lead you to, not to the perfect partner, but to the most suitablepartner for you. Being single is a phase of life that we need to be thankfulfor, because being single means ourhearts have yet to choose the best one for us.

Almost a Non-committal.

Jane Austen once wrote, that it is a truthuniversally acknowledged that a single man (or in our times a woman), inpossession of a good fortune is in search of a spouse (just to bepolitically correct). Well, that was what the old school wanted us tobelieve in. Married life is a path most of us would take, however, it is notthe only path there is. Relieve yourself of the pressure and stop making every single, straight guy friend a prospect.You have no business "entrapping" them and asking (which is more like"putting a gun in the head") them of their exclusive attention, if you'renot ready for commitment yourself. Sometimes, when you spend too much timetrying to find a boyfriend, you normally end up marrying the first loser who comes to your door.Take your time, the world will wait. Being married doesn't guarantee that itwill make your life happy. It doesn't guarantee anything at all. Sometimes,it only brings two miserable people together only to make their life evenmore miserable. Without the right intention, the emotional maturity,financial security and of course, unwaveringlove, you're better off unattached.

Living Life.

Don't put your life on hold for Mr. Right but don't let it waste away with Mr. Wrong. Life is about things that you do and happen toyou everyday. It's not about the things that could have happened but neverdid, or things that you think would happen in thefuture. Live life now. Live it to the fullest and stop beating yourself up,trying to be perfect on a Saturday night date. Allow life to surprise youwith it's most wonderful blessings.

Love maybe blind but it will find you..

The now popular song goes...I don't wanna wait in vain for your love... because summer is here, I'm still waiting there...The big question is, darling...whoever told you you had to wait?The biggest mistake anyone could ever make in his or her life is to wait for a love to come running to you, come sweep you off your feet, or come whisk you away on a magic carpet ride. You shouldn't wait for love to hit you, wait for love to crawl into your skin, nor wait to fall in love.

Don't wait for love...because you don't have to. It will just happen.How many times have we waited for phone calls? How many late nights have we let ourselves dream for THE DAY...for THE ONE?

Countless? You're not alone. Because in a world of the so-called free-willed people, we all expect and grow up having these romantic notions of a lover whom we will choose, someone who will choose US over a dozen,thousand,or even millions of women out there. Who wouldn't swoon over that thought? Imagine being handpicked and told over and over again..." You are the one for will always be the one in my heart..."

But it doesn't happen that way. You want love? Here's the deal-clincher: your heart never chooses who to love. At some point or another your heart will love a loser. At some point or another your heart will love someone who can never love you...someone who will make you cry...someone who will forget how important you are...someone who will never, ever even realize how important you are...someone who will not see WHO you are...someone who will never hold your hand for everyone to see...someone who loves someone else...someone who will play with your heart...someone who will never share your dreams with you...someone who will want everything but cannot give anything...someone who will never be yours...someone who will love you today but change their mind tomorrow...someone who will lie...someone who will tell you they love you, but act as if they don't...someone who will steal your heart and never give it back.

You will always come across someone who will not even realize what they're talking about. Words are important, but words can be fatal if not used carefully and not thought about.Words can hurt. Specially if they were assumed to be real but they weren't. Sweet tongues and smooth operators are countless. They were not born yesterday, no matter how old or young...they have been around and they know how to woo you out of limitations and safe boundaries. Once they have you bogged down out of your you-can't-make-me-love-you-zones, they discard you like used rags.

But that's how the heart works. It was made to love someone who SEEMS to love you. Because the heart's a little stupid. On the other hand, the good side to that innocence of the heart is that, it will not fend off affection that people with real intentions will offer. And that's your heart's go signal to love.Good for you.When that happens just don't push love away. You don't have to wait for love, dear... please don't. But when it comes, open your arms and let it in. It may not be the forever kind of love..or the one to make your heart race everytime..or the one to give the sweet, silent contentment whenever you're holding each other's hands and just sitting next to each other..but at least, it's there. It may not be love yet..just not as of yet..but knowing there's someone who's willing to be the one to care for you and share a few moments with you the witness to your life: its bitterness, its joys, its pains, its ho-hum days..that's what really matters...

Monday, September 6, 2010

Dear Diary #4: It's Over..

Dear Diary,

After 5 fruitful years, it's over..

I'd like to take this spot to air my side. To let you know how I feel, of what would become of me after this. I'm still questioning myself: WHY, WHAT, WHEN, HOW?

Why did you have to stop from loving me? Was it because of someone else? Was it just a natural feeling to fell out of love? I can hardly accept the fact that someone has taken my place in your heart. Was she far beautiful than me? Was she able to provide things I'm not capable of giving? I did my part but, I guess, wasn't really enough to bring you happiness and contentment. I promised myself not to feel bitterness as it wouldn't even do me any good. Whatever you've seen on her, whatever she have given you, hope that brought you satisfaction.

My thoughts are scattered, don't know where to start. Maybe I should be thanking you first. Thank you for being my friend and lover for 5 years. You've brought me happiness & smile on my face. I thanked you for what you've given me. For the countless sweet nothings, 'blongpish', 'pinchut'..

geez.. cant finish this.. im crying na.. be back.. :(

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