Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Are You Being Cheated?

You finally meet somebody to love and to cherish. Your dream about the wedding dress, making you a princess, admiration of the bridegroom and all the guests, demonstrating your enviable hour-glass figure, comes true finally.

Have you already thought your future life over? A country house, lovely babies to look after? How to make your still-loving-and-hoping heart forget about it? You are absolutely crushed by the situation. But what is to be done, if your Prince Charming is just cheating on you? Isn’t it better to be in blissful ignorance, or to face the problem and tackle it? It’s up to you, but your aching heart is silent. Emotions... nothing but emotions.

But what made you sure, that you are cheated on (except the case, when you catch your cheating boyfriend/cheating girlfriend “on the scene of crime”)? They say, the most tormenting thing in cheating is suspicion.

What are the signs of cheating? Well, it depends. You have been knowing each other not for the first year, or you’re living together for a long time, you know all the habits and tastes of your partner, there’s already a lot of routine in the relationships, and you don’t even remember how it felt in the beginning. You’ve been feeling very comfortable, but suddenly you may find out that something doesn’t seem right or just different. In fact that’s the sign number one. So is he/she cheating on you?

Being too suspicious is also wrong. But there are some signs of a cheating partner that are quiet obvious. Yes, it’s the lipstick on the shirts, cheeks or anywhere else, smell of a perfume, which is not yours. Slim cigarettes or any other things forgotten in the car, whispering in the cell-phone talks, the unknown phone numbers or even addresses, notes, letters, e-mails, sms, extra-work, extra-miles, odd explanations of the absence or phone switched off, strange credit cart receipts, and so on, and so forth.

Are there any special signs of cheating? What makes us suspect? Less attention and time devoted to us? Or visa versa – as if your partner is redressing a wrong? More care about he/her himself/herself? New sexy underwear? Strange smell? Alien things? Have you noticed some coldness in relationships?

Cheating partners always do show those signs in behavior in more or less obvious way. For instance, a cheating girlfriend can start a sudden diet, or go to a fitness club, go on buying new clothes, probably of a more sexy style than usually. A cheating boyfriend, on the other hand, may not be going crazy about his appearance as women do, but still can show more attention to what he looks like.

Changing habits, tastes, which have been the same for years, point on cheating partners. Also cheating may start with paying attention to the things they never cared about or were interested in. But that doesn’t always mean that he or she is cheating. That’s the sign of some strong external influence. Changes in the relationships between the partners should make anyone become aware of that something is happening. Cheating partners may become more attentive and nice, or, on the contrary, indifferent and aggressive; they can start giving sudden gifts trying to decrease the guilt they feel inside; or they can find permanent faults in the behavior of their second halves, blaming in such a on them their own relations on the side.

All these give heartache, and pain, and suffering… Do you hesitate if it’s right to ask bluntly? Talk to your partner. Then take a decision.

Can we explain cheating partners? Why? Is your cheating boyfriend is crazy about beautiful women? Is he a primitive womanizer? Or, maybe, cheating partners are getting fed up with the present way of life and looking for the new? The beginning of your ‘love story’ is the most important phase. Did your partner tell you about his love of seducing, or you planned your future family life together? Here is the core of the problem. Maybe, you were so carried away by your dreams, that didn’t want to hear about his desire to be free?

How not to drive yourself and your partners to cheating?

Always remember, that any problem is easier to prevent, than to solve its’ consequences. What kills your feelings? Sex is wonderful, but it has to be given much more than that, when two people live together. And only you have to find some way out of the situation.

The basis to the relationship must be 100 % trust in each other’s love. So, respect your partner’s wishes and interests. Give him/her a bit of liberty. Do not dissolve in your partner totally and absolutely. Have your own occupations and interests.

Give yourself, and even your partner, the adequate space. With love there should never be such a word as ‘habit’. To find the ‘right’ person – who is 100 % physically and mentally attractive – is like finding a diamond in a coal mine.

Treasure him/her! Never take the person you love for granted! Try to brighten his/her day with a word, a kiss, making love on the spur of the moment. Be fabulous and exciting, loving and wise.

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