Comfy on Being Confident

Are you confident? How would you rate your confidence level (1-lowest; 10-highest)?


These questions may seem so easy to answer. You may answer yes to the first question. But to the second question? Would you say 1 or 10? Many wouldn't dare rate themselves 10. Probably, in between 7-9. But not 10. So, what gives?


Everyone can tell to the world they're confident but they can't gauge their confidence level. Why? How can we win battles if we're not fully equipped? How can we fire our guns without any bullets?


Confidence killers. These are the culprits. They're the one responsible why we can't hit a 10. Let's name a few.

1. Engaging in self-limiting beliefs. We usually rely on beliefs and traditions. We tend to avoid things as advised by our elders and friends. Simply, we boxed ourselves and never come out. The result is fear of ignorance. And since we've already set ourselves on the things that we would like to believe in, we can't help but compare ourselves to others. Why can they do such things when I can't? Because we believe that we simply can't.


2. Focusing on the past. We can't raise it to 10 because we're haunted by past experiences. Bad experiences and mistakes. We've developed a fear that things will happen again, even if for no reason. We're afraid to give our best shot because we believe that we will fail. We can't project a new attitude and a new look because we don't want people to say we've changed. And that the change doesn't fit us! We work on ourselves not for the people that we might encounter in the future but for the people in our past.


3. Setting unrealistic expectations. Too perfectionist. Too pessimistic. No one's stopping us from being confident but make sure that we can handle the confidence we're trying to imbibe.We try to believe that we can take things down but we're not even coupled with the skills needed.


So, how do we kill these confidence killers? How to stop ourselves from being killed? The savior: Confidence boosters. Here are some ways.


1. Strong support system. Anyone and anything can be our support system so long as they provide encouragement, positivity, compliments and constructive feedback, and so on and so forth. Make sure we're surrounded by these kind of people and things.


2. Success. Whenever we achieve success, it affirms value to ourselves. And we should maintain it. We are not only showcasing, but we are also highlighting our potentials. And gaining more potentials is one way of driving our confidence level.


3. Write down your thoughts. These can be random words. Jotting down all the goals you want to achieve. Evaluate. Reflect. Then look for ways on how you can materialize your thoughts.


4. Know your stuff. Fight self-ignorance. Never stop learning. As simple as engaging yourself into reading, writing and conversing with different people, you are learning. It's never too late to empower ourselves with knowledge. No one's above anyone unless you let them. Always believe that there are things you know that they don't.


5. Be prepared. Practice makes perfect. You must be prepared for you to be called confident enough. You don't want to be presented to anyone and you just stand there and at loss for words. Remember, when we were tasked by our teachers to do a class report, we make sure we're prepared for it, from visual aids to the wordings itself. We tend to practice in front of the mirror to check on our reflections and how should we project when the big day comes. But in real life, we can no longer have the same rituals. We must be prepared in a snap. We'll never know when will the situation calls for it.


6. Learn to laugh at yourself. Why still dwell on things (failures, hurt, pain) when it already happened? As they say, the damage has been done. There's no point of turning back. As if we could still turn back time! Just be grateful it happened and your still the same person. You might lost something but it doesn't mean that you wont gain something.


7. Positivity. There's always a flip side to negative things. From simple wordings to our actions, we can turn them positively. Avoid using negative words like can't, don't, never etc. You may decline invites by not saying no. Use affirmative words. Then smile.


These are just some thoughts I've gathered. I got all of these from the rendezvous I've attended. And I want to share everything to all of you. Hope this helps. 


I, myself, is still struggling on building up my confidence and how to raise the level. But I don't want to give up. I don't want to show I'm weak when I know that I got what it takes to be confident. I am grateful enough that even if I haven't reached level 10 yet, I am still confident in my own way.


Let's all work together on how to take down these confidence killers and add more on what would boost our confidence more. Should you have any ideas or thoughts on how to fight confidence killers, feel free to share. Before i end this post, I just want to share this link on confidence boosters.